I never understood a working mother’s guilt. I just figured that it happened to someone that maybe didn’t have it all together…something vague. But now as I drop her off day in and day out at daycare I understand. When I’m told by others about her day I understand. When I’m told that she loves the sprinklers and “is really walking”, I understand.
Today, as I was signing her out I heard her cry. I rushed over to her ‘classroom’ and asked what happened. I was told that she fell off a ‘horsey’. I wanted to strangle someone – I know – ilogical. I know – these things happen. Still, I wanted to do so. And then I go home wondering if I would have been told about this had I not walked in and seen it. These are the kinds of scenarios that break my heart and have me wondering about her welfare.
It’s days like to today that I wish I could just turn my back on my job and stay home with my daughter so that a slip of paper or someone I hardly know will not have to tell me about her day.
I’m contracted to work for my job for 2 years…and it’s days like today that I hardly know how I will get through it.