All the Right Questions


Last week after a training session someone asked the pregnant colleague about the baby.  I think she is over 6 months and getting bigger by the day.  She said that the baby was moving a lot because she was eating chocolate.  This killed me a little inside – you see,that was what I loved most about being pregnant with Daniella – the way she would move right after a meal.  I was right at the edge – the tears were ready to emerge, but I held it together.  And then she whipped out the sonogram photos.  I was able to bear her sonogram photos at 10 weeks – because frankly, there isn’t much to see.  Not  so at 20+ weeks.

“I can’t”, I stammered. 

“Are you, ok?”

“Um yeah…but I can’t”.

It has been slightly awkward ever since.

I felt I owed her an explanation.  Well I know I didn’t *owe* her anything, but she is a real sweetheart and has been nothing but good to me since I started working there.  So…I told her today.  She was understanding and kind and gentle.  She told me that two other women at work have similiar situations.  She told me about one that has been trying for a long time and spending lots of cash to achieve a pregnancy. 

She let me know I wasn’t alone.

She asked if we took photos.   She asked what they looked like. 

She actually asked something about my girls. 

Someone asked about them, I can’t tell you what that means to me.

No wonder I like her so much.


About Jessica Emilia

Mother, wife, grief survivor, dancer, yogi, feminine, baker, cook, lover, fighter, perfectly imperfect, optimistic, pessimistic, reader, writer, funny, sarcastic, compassionate, emphatic, sympatheric, HR Pro, anxious, confident, supernatural, hocus-pocus, friend, daughter and momma again...

5 responses »

  1. You aren’t alone, honey. But I’m glad you told her about the girls, and even happier she is such a compassionate person.

  2. Oh sweetie. ((HUGS))

    I know what you mean when someone actually recognizes your babies. It touches your heart so deep and you will always know that she’s there for you.

    She sounds like a wonderful friend. I’m so glad she’s come into your life.

    Hugs and love.


  3. I’m so glad she didn’t let you down when you trusted her with something so precious. It’s rare to find someone who doesn’t run or change the subject or suddenly find a piece of lint on their shirt that they need to contend with.

    In other words – I’m glad you found such beauty in the midst of the ugly.


  4. Wow, I’m glad she acknowledged your girls lives and genuinely wanted to know more about them. I’m glad she did that for you and I’m glad you opened up to her. Maybe she can be a support system for you.

    I miss talking to you too.

    Hey isn’t your birthday coming up???

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