I was minding my business while walking Peaches and decided to go to the mailbox to extend our walk.  Bad idea.  An invitation for a NICU re.union was waiting for me.  They would like me to include a before and after photo of Daniella along with her story with my r.s.v.p.  

My eyes are stinging from the fresh warm tears.  My heart is at its capacity of pain.  I am in bed now hoping that sleep will give me a repreive from the wrenching pain.  I am done with this.  Just done.

I mean, don’t these fools know to double-check that the baby lived?  How do you NOT do that?  How?


About Jessica Emilia

Mother, wife, grief survivor, dancer, yogi, feminine, baker, cook, lover, fighter, perfectly imperfect, optimistic, pessimistic, reader, writer, funny, sarcastic, compassionate, emphatic, sympatheric, HR Pro, anxious, confident, supernatural, hocus-pocus, friend, daughter and momma again...

7 responses »

  1. that’s terrible, jaded. I’m so sorry. I think it’s worth a letter or call to their department. even a note on the RSVP to mail back. it’s just thoughtless and wrong. and of course unnecessary and completely unavoidable to cause you even further anguish. so sorry.

  2. ….because there are hundreds of babies in and out of the NICU in a one or two year time period….and some slacker hospital personnel doesn’t do his/her job completely, they just blanket send to everyone who has ever been there, and just assume they were so wonderful that every one of those children survived.

    Personally, I would type up a short but direct letter and send back with the response and say “Your invitation system failed miserably. My daughter passed away IN YOUR HOSPITAL, and this invitation was heartbreaking to me. In the future, please check every name on your list before you send these types of things out so that you do not cause another mother to have a really bad day like you did me”.

    Big hug to you, darlin. Better days are ahead….

  3. Oh how awful. I can only imagine how it sucked your breath away.

    I agree – that should be checked before they ever send anyone an invitation. Always.

    I would call the office the invite came from and tell them – let them know how receiving their invitation felt and tell them they need to check before sending one to mothers in the future.

    It won’t take the sting and pain of receiving one away, but it could help another mother in the future from the same experience.


  4. Write them a note via the local paper. This is careless and they need to know that they are making you relive the pain that you live through every day. Contact the President of the Hospital, the patient activist, President Obama for God Sake. They have got to stop sending these letters out. It seems that you have gotten a few of these horrible letters. You are probably not the only person getting these invitations who are grieving a deceased baby. I…. I don’t know what to say. I will say a prayer for you and all of the families that are suffering from this miscommunication.

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