I am in an uncharacterically chipper mood. I am feeling much more acclamaited at work, having proven myself while my boss had to unexpectedly leave. I am also very happy that tomorrow at this time, I should be en route to visit my mother and family in the south. I miss them so much! I can’t wait to put my arms around them! Hubby will later come down and stay with us in time for Thanksgiving day.
This would be one of the first major holidays that my daughter will never be around for. I do know that she is Heaven and with good company. I know that she is at peace and that she is surrounded by all our love. I picture her with my dear grandfather and the thought moves me so much that I my eyes are threatning to tear up…but I am blinking them back…blinking them back…holding them in their place. Like hubby says, I don’t want to think of her and feel sadness, that is not what her legacy should be.
On another note, M has truly dissapointed me, and I have come to the conclusion that at this point (if not indefinitely) I will just shut her out. I don’t know how someone can claim to be ‘sensitive’ yet send me emails of herself pregnant and sign them ‘M and Baby’. Ugh. Give me a brake…either be sensitive or be selfish but don’t act like the latter and claim to be the former. For Heaven’s sake. Where I come from that called being a hypocrite, I call ’em like I see ’em. Ya know??? Anyway no more time of my precious blog should be devoted to her or this subject. If there is one thing tragedy has taught me is to just push people out when they act like fools. Life is too short and it can be HARD and DIFFICULT and my favorite, DEVASTATING, and I am not going to waste one possibly happy moment on retards. That’s the reason I have pushed his parents out as well…geez.
Well yes, the day is moving along and I will go home to my baby tonight after getting my hair done at the beauty salon. Then it’s the final suitcase check and then on to my current favorite thing to do – a ttc session with the hubby. I shold be ovulating today.
I’m gonna miss him while i’m away, but I know it’s good to get away and miss each other every so.
It’ back to work, I think my 10 minute break is now over 😦